The Spirit of Being Alive

Do you ever wonder how fragile life is?

It hangs by a thread , called uncertainty

Uncertainty of jurisdictions within the space-time continuum, within ourselves and within/amongst the people around us

A constant tug-of-war between the unspoken and unheard, the only constant is uncertainty

The fragility of life is an unspoken truth,

A shadow we often overlook

a bright day we forget to enjoy

a mild breeze on a hot summer's day, a popsicle to keep summer sorrows at bay

Little joys galore, seldom do we appreciate them to-day

We crib and we loathe

we digress from our oaths

we're solemn when we must thrive

we're angry all the time

unseemingly there's enough, there's no pleasing the heart and mind

but aren't these joys the real reason to be alive

what a beautiful time it is, for us to be born, to be alive..

full of wonders of the past, living in Humankind's prime

but we prefer to struggle to meet ends with our mind, 

unwillingly to keep our gadgets aside, 

unwillingly to show true emotion,

unwillingly to shed a tear, 

unwillingly to call spade-a-spade,

unwillingly to say I'm not okay, take my hand, hear my voice

unwillingly to be comforted, 

unwillingly to be loved, solely because it's a struggle to be true

our lives stuck in the past, eyes locked on a mirage called the future

we suffer to see the mirage, all the white-lies

our absent minds, in  the present

heaving passive-aggressive sighs,

sentenced to ifs/ifs-not, but and why

a child once lay flat on the grass, 

his eyes locked onto the blue sky,

he was the pilot on the plane flying by

he was the very spirit of being alive

Half Full Glass

Benevolent winds chase my actions,

A clear vision of the blue sky, my eyes seek not the nature's beauty alone..

But the glory of sound of the sea 

Compassion runs thicker than blood in my veins,

Clear waters sweep me off my feet,  content yet melancholic my heart sings a different melody,

One of finer journeys, something like Fur Elise, known around the world yet unknown, a tune like that resembles the song of my heart,

Softer in synth, sharper bass, and quiet at the mic

It could be the washing away of the sand off my feet, or the weight off my chest, 

I have often let my dreams unfurl, to meet the realms of the world

Disappointment being a part and parcel of this journey like everyone else's

Yet somewhere I feel I've reached a milestone called 'someplace nice', some find it in their hearts, I feel it's just a state of mind, 

My eyes found the world underneath the star laden sky last night, 

I found the moon right where I locked my gaze, 

I'm awaiting a lull, this furious pacing of my mind must standstill, 

I take a step forward, the water breaks my stride, 

I've realized one only goes forward and never back, 

Lost glories, partial stories and unrequited emotions like water, must not break us and only our pace, that too only from time to time

'cause life is too short for misery and mundane lives

Live the life that you dream when you close your eyes, 

Jaded in nature's arm or in a chair with your face perched on a screen, do what it takes to call it a good life. 

Moonchild

Courtesy-Kaethe Butcher

Why wouldn’t you come out in the open and revel in your failures?

The dying breath of a love you’ve been working on,

The silence of disappointments reeking in the family room,

The quick sight of a dwindling career,

The angst of accomplished friends,

Losing sight of familiarity,

Coming to terms with reality

Why wouldn’t you come out in the open and caress your memories?

The dismal state of your former wellbeing speaks volumes of the voice you miss

This aching heart of yours brims with emotions beyond your comprehension, beyond your mind’s checklist and your heart’s deepest desires and wants

The moment when you held your mama’s hand to take your first steps only to fall down

The days when you played in the Sun, unaware of the dirt or the leering glares

You shunned it all out, and yet you have it locked inside

Glories of soccer, Nintendo and Keenan alike, you wear on your sleeve with delight,

The memories of these glories you take away from light

Why wouldn’t you come out in the open and bare your broken heart?

With the everlasting sight of being in your lover’s arms

The unspoken reality of drowning in kisses for far too long

The unbearable denial of the fire running out, and bringing you down

The eyes that met once across the room all comforting and warm feel like chagrin now in the eyes remnants of your peace and calm

Why wouldn’t you come out in the open and speak your mind?

Those failures make us the individuals that we are,

Unrequited love is not only a thing of art, but more so the undying melody of a stronger heart

Men and women cannot be the same, and never apart

Like bones to your limbs

And blood to your heart

We all need the failures, the scars, the pain, the art to survive in this world of ours.

Take it easy, moonchild, fall over and over then begin again from the start,

Where you leave your story to unfold, there begins your art

Come buy me some soda, we’ll breathe some Mary Jane and from my closet-heart,

We’ll try to figure out Monty Python and the Holy Grail right from the start.

Demotional

At your quiet behest,I've agreed to this subtle ecstasy of knowing a little more about myself,

Learning the nuances of grieving a litlle less to chasing a unknown charade of dreams

I've come undone, slowly pacing towards the light,

Light at the end of this endless tunnel, reeking in nostalgia of spirited times, 

Swamped in the treasure of carefree whispers, unyielding madness and maniacal laughter..

Sprinting through life is like this tunnel, I can't feel my face at this pace and I cannot stand upright unless someone holds me still

Sipping on this cup of coffee,I mischievously think of drowning my gloom in the memory of familiar joy, 

A baritone lingers in my head, the music of my half-contented heart

I've chased a few dreams in my mind,palaces of dreams exhumed in the spirit of this vile vile monotony,

I blink, I smile I chase a few dreams as the pages of this book turn one after the other, seconds to hours on my lap, my life in disguise 

I've let the sand slip away, I've kept quiet, I've memorized that fainting baritone, I now have a lullaby, from the remnants of time..

I've been engaged in this sorcery of life, I've been cornered for keeping quiet, I've been a hostage of my own mind,

I've been living a life, where tools of survival are heaving underneath the heaviness of thoughts, and partial guides,

My sermon from last night, drowned in wine

A flock of birds in the sky, a gentle reminder of finer times

Of galloping horses,twinkling stars in the ushering sky,lush green fields with lillies for the eyes and the petrichor soothing the heaviness from the daylight that quickly went by..

I've become a prisoner of self,surviving my mind, 

I've become the lullaby I used to hum, only to live the outcome of my vision,awry of my own dreams,

Wishful desires that await me, I condemn dreams that don't melt away with time, 

I toss the wine glass in my hand, one last ushering, 

Savor the tide of time, be nonchalantly wise,

That's my everlasting surmise

Watch over you

Let me take you for a walk,

Lets stroll for a while, we'll walk along the roads unknown,

Stay away from the tarmac stretch for a start

I'll have the song, of your taste and you can sing to the tune of mine,

Silence being our cherished banter,

I wonder why you keep looking strangely into thin air, like you know where we're headed 

I don’t expect you to be abreast with this little journey, time is the longest it will take to complete this one, I wish to keep walking..

Blow caution to the wind, I must

Pray, must you later tell someone I tricked you, in the manner of a comforting banter and a sparsely moonlit night..

A walk to eternity

***

This place, where we now stand  seems oddly familiar to where I first heard a Cuckoo whisper, and in the next an Owl howl,

But this is not the beginning of the path per say, it’s a fork. 

Its here for us to make up our minds, even in peace time, race against will, sans the support of gin

You can either take a step forward or turn around to go back to another start..

I like to call this the Fork of Faith. I must clarify it’s not Religion I speak of but the insistence and belief in taking time towards the course of unknown turns and incidents

Like a half woven cloth, waiting to be shaped I like this translation from the start and not meet finished ends, last time I deliberately pulled a string apart

 As the weaving seized, I began again right from the start,
The fork was mine to weave back then like it is now
So shall we? Would you walk ahead or contemplate behind my back? 
You could be the master of this weave, while 

I hover on my toes over the breeze from the east, 

You see these trees right there far east, the ones that cover the abundance that is this long stretch, they must've been a mere spectacle of Tyndall’s find until one of our kind walked through this dwelling of charms that are fallen leaves and withered wood, reeking of the sumptuous Petrichor, 

One of us built a house here and it has incessantly ruined the hymns of the breeze and ballads of the sea

If you may, take a deep breath into the slight moist air and you will know what the Mulberry fruits and sweet Lavender from the hidden view have shared with us, if I could I would never empty out my lungs 

Alas! I sigh in relief, for every whiff into the wind is like a treat

I feel like this is where my dream could seize, I could open my eyes and lose the treat

Let us walk further, or perhaps just revel in this solemn slumber, and take one step a day, I would dream again that way
I want to walk the unknown

I don’t know the way ahead, I wouldn’t care to know either. I know enough for the canvas I had laid on my bedside, 

I have soiled it with hues of blue, just the shade of tonight

I;m seeping in the last whiff of the air around me, I'm sinking into reality, 

I quietly wait for the dream to end, aware of where you will be after all this while

I killed birds with stones at night, and while you saw me from the distance with a million question in your eyes I simply watched over you, 

All this while tucked under your chin, half past midnight. 

Waqt

Bekaraar zindagi ko sambhalne ka waqt hi kahan hai,

Waqt mein masruf toh kayi hain,

Par kya waqt ka mohtaj bhi koi hai?

Kya pehchana hai kisi ne ki shayad hum aaj bhi wahin hai, jahan hum the kabhi

Ye kal aur aaj sab kuch, yahin, yahin hai.

Faaslon se shayad dosti badi hai hume aaj kal,

Ke woh ek haseen jo saath hai, kareeb hai par saath nahi hai

Ye gham hume aaj se nahi, gham humse nahi hai,

Ye gham hume waqt se hai,

Waqt begana hi sahi, humara bhi nahi hai..

Phir kyun waqt ki aad mein zindagi humse door khadi hai?

Jee ley, aaj yahin, yahin zindagi hai.

Blue Valentine

Tumultuous and deranged

Sorrow walked towards me,

Half beaten, and eternally yielding to qualms,

Failure by its side, it unhinged the door 

At my porch it stood,

Like my match from above,

Like my unrequited love,

An ordeal I left long ago when I struggled to survive

A pragmatic dream,

A forlorn friend,

And a lover in angst

I waited for it to hunt me down and prey on me,

I knew it wouldn't kill me,

I knew it would not recede,

It’s a lifetime worth of agony,

A harmless survivor, with an undistinguished far sight,

I was half beaten, as I am now,

Yet

I walked a million miles and I stood where I did, for a moment undefined in Time.

Until the end of the beginning, a continuum of space-time

Infinity, of the infinite tempest, half yielding, and half sworn to be divine

Merciless sorrow is perhaps

A Tempest,

 Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind